| Related sites for http://leavingthebubble.blogspot.com |
| FDA_Drug_Approvals_List Updated weekly as a service by CDER's Division of Data Management and Services. | | Hardin_MD_-_Pharmacy_and_Pharmacology From the University of Iowa, lists of Internet sources in pharmacy, pharmacology, pharmaceutical, and drugs. | | Institute_of_Pharmacology,_Polish_Academy_of_Sciences Information about the Institute and its neuropharmacological research, including psychotropic drugs. | | Laboratory_of_Pulmonary_Pharmacology Research in human lung, reactivity of bronchial and vascular tissues, role of the eicosanoids and the cholinergic system. | | The_Lycaeum__An_Entheogenic_Database Contains a comprehensive listing of various mind altering substances, including their chemical structures and effects (with first person accounts). | | New_York_University_Department_of_Pharmacology Teaching of medical and graduate students, with research programs in normal growth and differentiation, development and pathology of the nervous system, and mechanisms of normal and abnormal functions | | Novartis_Pharma Links to Pharmacology Research Partners. | | The_Ones_That_Stain_Blue Visionary mushrooms: studies in ethnopharmacology. | | Optimizing_a_Unimodal_Response_Function_for_Binary_Variables Adaptive sampling to locate the best dose. | | Ottosen_Site_for_Drug_Safety_and_Pharmacovigilance Information about drug safety and clinical studies. Includes discussion forum, news and practical information about issues like safety reporting, licensing, contracts, PSUR, E2B, electronic submission | | Pharmacology_and_Legal_Drugs_-_About_com Original articles, and instructions for finding more information, about specific drugs and medications. Find new drug approvals, drug-related news, and links to additional resources, pharmacy schools | | SMR\'s_Case_Histories_of_Drug_Discovery Society for Medicines Research symposium on Case Histories of Drug Discvery held on December 2, 1999 in London. On demand webcast of entire symposium now available. | | Social_Audit_-_the_Antidepressant_Web Economic, medical and regulatory issues around antidepressants, esp. paroxetine withdrawal syndrome; public accountability and freedom of information; discussion pages. | | University_of_Colorado_Health_Sciences_Center_-_Department_of_Pharmacology Information about theur pharmacology graduate program, curriculum, and research activities. | | The_Virtual_Clinical_Pharmacologist Includes lectures, manuals and software, as well as a list on anticoagulation. | | Abbycon_com\'s_Directory_of_Home_Care Links to care providers and information. | | ACP_Home_Care_Guide American College of Physicians sponsored guidelines for treatment of advanced cancer at home. Options for download, online viewing chapters including caregiving, cancer pain, shortness of breath, and | | Caregivers_Advisory_Panel Collects, quantifies and interprets facts, opinions and needs of family caregivers to enable health care products manufacturers, service providers, and policy makers to gain insight for their decision | | Caregiversguide_com Search for long term care facilities, home care agencies, day care, and alternative facilities. | | Home_Care_Helper Resources for home care providers on planning ethics, telehealth and elder suicide. | | Home_Health_Aide_Finders Place for families to find, contact and hire home health aides in geographical area from database of aides. Information on list, registration, and contacts. | | Home_Health_Provider Resource for professionals in the managed care industry. Includes information on home health care, rehabilitation, geriatric care, infusion therapy and related topics. | | Home_Healthcare_Solutions_Provider Directory providing information, products, and services for patients and families seeking home healthcare. | | Kansas_Home_Care_Association_(KHCA) Nonprofit member organization providing leadership, support, advocacy, and services. Information on education, events, directory, and contacts. | | National_Association_for_Home_Care_(NAHC) Trade association representing the interests and concerns of home care agencies, hospices, home care aide organizations, and medical equipment suppliers. | | National_Private_Duty_Association Consists of organizations that provide medical and non-medical private duty home care services. Includes membership information, calendar, news, and directory. | | SeniorMag_com_-_National_Directory_of_U_S__Home_Care_and_Health_Care_Service_Providers Lists many home care companies who provide services to senior citizens. | | Wisconsin_Homecare_Organization Statewide trade association for home health care providers. Includes information for consumers. | | ADA_org__Root_Canal_(Endodontic)_Treatment_FAQs Find answers to your questions with this reference about root canal (endodontic) treatment from the American Dental Association. | | Root_Canal_Therapy A discussion of root canal therapy which explains its process, what is involved and if the treatment is painful. | | Root_Canal_Treatment An explanation of the root canal treatment process. Answers various questions on the treatment such as what the individual processes are in the treatment, if it is painful and what causes it to fail. | | Root_Canals_Pose_Health_Threats An interview with Dr. George Meinig who brings a perspective to an expose of latent dangers of root canal therapy. | | Between_Zeus_and_the_Salmon Online version of multi-author book describing biology and demography of longevity. Book can be ordered from National Academy Press. | | Calculation_of_Life_Expectancy Concise explanation of the mathematics of life expectancy calculation with links to related concepts. | | Death__An_Inquiry_into_Man\'s_Mortal_Weakness The life expectancy page within a much larger effort to put mortality into perspective. | | Discussion_of_impact_of_changing_life_expectancy_on_policy_decisions Canadian government report on impact of changes in life expectancy and healthy life expectancy | | Duke\'s_Center_for_Demographic_Research\'s_bibliography_on_longevity_and_healthy_life_expectancy_ Mostly citations but some links to online material | | Genetics_of_Longevity Powerpoint presentation by Tom Kirkwood, who developed an evolutionary theory of longevity which he calls "disposable soma". | | Healthy_Life_Expectancy Offers an international comparison of disability adjusted life expectancies. | | Innovita_Research_Institute Research on aging, molecular concepts of aging, cloning and age-related diseases such as Alzheimers, Werner syndrome, and Parkinsons. |
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STEPPING OUT OF THE BUBBLE
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STEPPING OUT OF THE BUBBLE
This blog is a tool for those interested in personal growth and development. Topics will be explored such as relationships, parenting, couples conflicts, anxiety and depression, and ways of changing self-defeating behaviors.
Authenticity and the Gay Identity
Many years ago, when I worked in education, I spent my summers directing outdoor park district activities for kids. The children would come from the neighborhood to play various games. One year I recall a teenage boy coming to the park with a desire to talk with me. He attended a youth group at his church (which was located nearby) and then would meander over to the park facility. At some point in our conversation, he told me that he was gay and that he felt ashamed as a result his church’s anti-gay sentiment. He felt very alone because he had told no one in his youth group of his ual orientation. His parents were not informed, and would have been mortified had they known of his ual identity. Each time he came to the park we would talk about his struggles with being gay. Because I had trained student leaders to work with the park kids, I was able to devote some attention to this troubled young man. This was my first exposure in conversing with an individual who professed to be gay. I learned a great deal about a segment of society that played out their lives in agonizing silence. Over time, I learned that gay people, like other minorities, are used to being stereotyped. Those of us who are straight, perceive gays to be effeminate, flamboyant, impulsive and artsy. Most of the gay people I have met do not fit that pattern. They typically feel isolated because their behavioral patterns are actually heteroual in nature with the exception of their ual affinity toward others of the same .With the advent of multicultural thinking, gays are beginning to feel more comfortable and accepted. Their level of confidence affects their relationships and style of relating to the world. The acknowledgement of being gay takes supreme courage. The odds have been stacked against those who choose to make their ual orientation known. Many s, now in midlife, are just beginning to acknowledge their true ual identity. With such exploration comes the awareness that “I feel a stronger ual connection with those of the same .” Such a realization may signal the emergence of terror – “I am not who I pretended to be.” When you listen to the stories of those who are gay, you get a sense of the conflict and tension they have experienced in their struggle to be authentic. Most have known from an early age that they felt different about their ual identity. In an attempt to conceal their feelings and behavior, many gays worked feverishly at removing any vestiges of gay traits from their behavior. This is exactly what African-Americans have done as they experienced the distain from those who embraced a Caucasian world-view.Adolescence is a difficult time of turmoil for most youngsters. Add to that the issue of ual identification and it certainly makes the process of navigating adolescence that much more strenuous. Many schools are afraid to acknowledge their gay students and provide little or no support for those in need. Ideological and political pressures play a role in keeping school administrators and school board members from stepping up to the plate in support for gay youth. In my professional counseling practice, I have personally witnessed the anguish and conflict experienced by those individuals who have professed to be gay. I have also observed the courage that many patients have demonstrated in the process of emerging from their silence over their ual orientation. Learning to be authentic is an important component of counseling and to honestly identify one’s ual identity may be apart of that process.Although there is little evidence to support its efficacy, many counselors surprisingly continue to espouse reparative treatment for gay clients. Counselors, who many times disguise their intentions, choose to subscribe to the archaic notion that ual orientation is a learned pattern or choice rather than a lifelong identity. Reparative therapy views the gay individual as disordered and in need of transformation. Generally, counselors who conduct reparative therapy for gays look for deep-seated traumas as a causative factor in the “identity conflict” of those they serve. Counselors who insist on touting reparative therapy for gays typically maintain their own biases regarding homouality. They carry these biases into treatment and negatively affect the self-worth and integrity of those they serve. Their insistence in curing gays creates a climate of self-doubt and defectiveness among those they treat. Many in the religious community are unable to reconcile their beliefs and faith and are reluctant to identify with those who define themselves as homoual. This fact causes many gays to reject their faith or live in a constant state of religious conflict. Years ago, a friend of mine decided to spend a weekend of solace at a religious retreat center. This was to be a time of isolation and reflection. However, her time quickly took on a new meaning. Gay men from churches throughout the country flew into this retreat center. Many of them were board members, elders, and pastors of their congregations. No one knew of their ual orientation with the exception of the hundreds of Christian colleagues who met at this retreat center to worship together once a year. Every year, these men got together in the freedom of their real identity and worshiped God. They talked with my friend, expressing their sense of liberation and love for the God they embraced. My friend said it was a moving experience as she was asked to join them in their religious services which were filled with energy and passion. Denial is a dangerous thing. Those who choose to ignore their true sense of self pay a price for their own personal betrayal. It takes courage to live with the way things really are. There are pitfalls along the way, but integrity calls for being true to who we are and who we have become. Those in the gay community have the right to define themselves in a way they desire. Unfortunately, for openly gay people, there are consequences for living with an identity they did not choose. James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S, LPC is an author, freelance writer, and nationally certified cognitive-behavioral therapist practicing in Scottsdale, Arizona. His personal growth book, Stepping Out of the Bubble is available at www.booklocker.com. James can be reached at www.jkboardroomsuites@yahoo.com.
posted by James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S., LPC, CCBT @ 7:33 PM
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It's a Long Way from Richwood to the White House
Several weeks before her death on July 26th of this year, my mother made an interesting discovery. Here was a 93 year old woman from Richwood, West Virginia, who clung tightly to her conservative Republican beliefs. But on this particular day, she smiled intently at me and proclaimed, "Barack Obama seems like such a nice young man." It was the first moment in my lifetime that my mother and I politically connected.This country has been down a perilous path in the past eight years. We have struggled through the presidency of George W. Bush, who failed this nation with his lack of integrity, feeble domestic direction and disastrous foreign policy. With Bush at the helm, we fought the wrong war for the wrong reasons and are still paying the consequences in loss of lives and economic calamity.We are in need of a new direction. Although John McCain stands out as a war hero, he has waged a campaign that is without substance. He has spent more time bashing his opponent than laying out clear plans to get the country moving again.Barack Obama has the vision, intelligence and judgment to lead our country down a more positive path. His campaign has been steady, and his campaign organization has been stellar. He has been maligned by many, some on this site, who ironically use their Christian faith as the basis for divisive comments. Accordingly, he is the "Muslim," "the enlightened one," "the anti-Christ," "the radical," "the terrorist," and “a Hitler.” He was also deemed guilty by association, as if John McCain didn't have enough affiliations with troubled individuals himself.Barack Obama's concepts and ideology mirror many valuable Judeo/Christian principles. He is not interested in continuing to feed the pocket-books of the wealthy. He personally identifies and has compassion for those of our comrades in need. He has one wife, one house and tattered shoes. He understands the needs of the middle class and the poor. By focusing on this country's crumbling infrastructure, he will get our people working again. His administration will create new jobs that will spur the economy. He understands that a "trickle down" economic policy does not work because the wealthy are tainted by their greed. He will work toward providing healthcare plans for all Americans. He will prioritize the budget and will eliminate wasteful governmental spending.His foreign policy will be founded on the principles of diplomacy, not power and control. He will fight the right war in the proper place, on the border of Pakistan and Afghanistan. We will regain our respectful standing in the world through promoting understanding rather than division. His vice presidential selection, Joe Biden, is ready to step in on the international stage. We will regain our credibility at home and abroad as Obama seeks to call out and prosecute those in our government who have shredded the Constitution, needlessly tortured prisoners, demonstrated political collusion, and overstepped executive privilege.Those Christians who would try to reduce this election to a referendum on abortion are mistaken. Most reasonable Americans do not "believe" in abortion. Rather, they embrace the sanctity of life, and believe that such a concept is much broader than any narrowly focused discussion regarding this complex moral dilemma.This is the most exciting election I've ever witnessed. For the first time in history, an African-American candidate is positioned to become President of the United States. The first 16 presidents of this country could have owned Senator Obama as a slave! How far we have come as we look forward to a new day in American history. I pray for him and his family as he seeks to lead this country out of turmoil.James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S., LPC, CCBT is an author, freelance writer and nationally certified cognitive-behavioral therapist practicing in Scottsdale, Arizona. He can be reached at (480) 664-6665.
posted by James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S., LPC, CCBT @ 6:47 PM
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McCain and the Mob Mentality
Barack Obama has become a metaphor for those who are considered culturally different. Disturbingly, we have been down this road of hatred and divisiveness before. Who can forget the chilling memories of America's civil rights leaders being slain, segregation being fostered, synagogues being burned, black citizens being lynched, and law-abiding Muslims being shot and killed after 9/11.This is the dark side of America that I'd rather forget, but once again has reared its ugly head through the campaign discourse of John McCain and Sarah Palin. McCain and Palin’s campaign rhetoric directed against Barack Obama has fueled the basest instincts of many misguided Americans.McCain's effort to link Obama to a terrorist Muslim script is rooted in the most despicable form of hatred and bigotry. The fire has been stoked, and now his supporters are cheering McCain and Palin with chants of… "Obama is a terrorist, kill him!" Having crossed that ugly line, even the candidates themselves have been unable to stave off the damage they have wrought. This pattern of inflaming the bigotry of the masses through divisiveness and venom is frighteningly reminiscent of the Nazi regime during World War II. Adolf Hitler and the German Nazis, under the elitism of white Anglo-Saxon Protestantism, sought and successfully slaughtered those who they perceived as ethnically and racially different. As Germany fell on hard economic times during the global depression, they looked for scapegoats to explain their financial decline. It wasn’t long ago that the Jews, those associated with Jews, Russians, the mentally ill, the physically disabled, artists, and the intelligentsia were sent to concentration camps and murdered. The mob mentality had worked and "cleansed" Germany of those who were perceived as funny looking and different.John McCain and Sarah Palin have sought out the politics of personal destruction. They have willingly tried to demonize Barack Obama by painting him as an evil outsider who is a threat to the security of our democracy. Amazingly, some Christians have made this a personal vendetta by suggesting that Obama is the anti-Christ. On the other hand, other so-called God-fearing Christians have suggested that he portrays himself as a messianic figure.The myth of moral superiority is that those who lay claim to know it all by smearing and hatemongering behavior, are the ones who need to "take the log out of their own eye" as Jesus suggested. As Sarah Palin lays claim to being the moral compass of the McCain campaign, she has opened herself to scrutiny as a result of unethically abusing her power as governor of Alaska.When McCain finally called Obama "a decent" candidate, he was jeered by his own supporters. It is this vitriolic venom that should remind us all that this is a country filled with the beauty of diversity, and that we must never allow such mindless people to create another Holocaust, because we turned our back and ignored those who would perpetuate a lie. As we have seen in recent days on the campaign trail, the hate-filled, spiteful mobs are still there to remind us all that we must be vigilant. We must speak out against the threats and fears generated by those who have the power to create the conditions for another genocide.
posted by James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S., LPC, CCBT @ 10:31 AM
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Maintaining Sibling Relationships As We Lose Our Parents
We of the baby-boomer generation are feeling the pressure as we provide care for our elderly parents. It is painful as we helplessly watch our loved one’s experience the impact of failing health. We feel powerless against the ravages of deteriorating health and mourn our losses as our parents begin the descent involving their incapacity to live independently. Children undergo the process of grieving as our parents move closer to the end of their lives. Family dynamics may shift.The process of grieving hopefully may bring healing and closure to children who care-take for elderly parents. However, more typically, it takes its toll in creating upheaval and conflict among the children. As elderly parents come to the end of their lives, the grieving process may serve as a catalyst which affects core issues and dynamics among the surviving children. If there are unresolved issues harbored by any family member, they will invariably surface during this time of distress. Grieving and loss have a way of opening the door for unfinished psychological business that has been “swept under the rug.” One can only hide the pain for so long and then inevitably the truth, wrapped in emotional baggage, will make itself known.The children of an aging parent are forced to deal with a myriad of new decisions and problems. However, legal, financial, and questions related a parent’s possessions tend to be the focal point for conflict among siblings during the process of parental decline. Children, who face these issues with their unresolved baggage, create tension for the entire family system. Hopefully, parents help minimize the impact of sibling conflict by structuring their will and financial matters effectively.Quibbling over finances or belongings may represent the way in which children play out their unresolved conflicts toward the elderly parent and their interaction with each other. They may feud over jewelry and other personal possessions belonging to the parent, leaving the elderly parent feeling resentful or guilt-ridden. The turmoil may exacerbate the parent’s declining health. Misunderstandings may exist over who gets what and when. Interpersonal conflict emerges when the grieving process serves as a metaphor for unfinished family business. Although most parents dread the prospects, it is not unusual for children to break communication with each other after the death of their parent.Because feelings are more intense during the declining health of an elderly parent, the children are more prone to become reactive. Reactivity leads to anxiety, and anxiety promotes misunderstanding and defensive communication. Like the advent of premarital counseling, perhaps there should be therapy for children who are trying to navigate the process of caretaking for an elderly parent in deteriorating health.What are some of the ways that children can cope more effectively while caretaking for an elderly parent and avoid the traps that cause interpersonal damage?Make sure that there are legal documents in place, including a will, durable power of attorney, and a trust. They should be updated, particularly if there is any transition from state to state.Make sure that your parent specifies, outside of the will, items to be distributed equitably to all family members.Children of the elderly need to work on responding, by promoting understanding, rather than reacting with defensiveness and resentment.Children should seek professional counseling assistance when they are unable to manage their personal grief and it begins to affect their functioning as well as other family members.Learn to keep things in perspective. Money and things are not worth severing relationships and causing hurt feelings within the family. Our legacy and our families should be based on the quality of our relationships.Caretaking for the elderly is a difficult process. It takes patience, wisdom, and the ability to sort out issues related to our parents and siblings. We must take the high road consisting of integrity when dealing with our family members. There are not guarantees that they will do the same. Nevertheless, we must vow to make peace with our past, care for our parents, and let go of our loved ones in a way that will bring peace and healing to our life. In doing so, we will never have regrets.
posted by James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S., LPC, CCBT @ 3:57 PM
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CHUCKLING YOUR WAY THROUGH THE GOLDEN YEARS
No matter what the experts say, aging is difficult. It takes a fair amount of luck, good genes, family support and activity to make this journey work. There is one added quality that really lightens the load as the elderly are faced with their "golden years," and that is the capacity to laugh at oneself and life.As the aches and pains start mounting, and the aged begin to feel alone in their plight, humor is a powerful potion for sustaining an attitude for success. Life becomes a chain of mountains to climb, and the hiking is much easier if the elderly navigate their journey by poking fun at a world filled with challenges. Seniors must learn to float downstream, buoyed by the water as they pass by the twigs, branches and rocks along the current of life.When it comes to humor, the late George Carlin would have been proud of my mother. At 93 years old, she can take a life event and turn it into an amazing, dramatic story filled with adventure and lessons to be learned. Recently, she had a stint in the hospital due to atrial fibrillation, an indicator of congestive heart failure. Although my mom's heart is pushing enough blood, the upper chamber is showing signs of wear and tear.When she was released for home from the hospital, my mother graduated from two pills to an assortment of blood thinners as her cardiologist sought to regulate her heart-beat. She stayed in a nursing care facility for awhile and then was sent back to her independent living apartment on a trial basis. Several days later at 5 a.m., she fell in her bathroom and landed on her hip. She had the presence of mind to crawl to the pull-cord to get the attention of the nursing-care staff. They promptly arrived, called me and contacted the paramedics for another round to the emergency room.When I got to the ER, she dejectedly said, "Son, I'm sorry I messed up." "Did you use your walker to get to the bathroom?" I replied. "No, it was filled with all kinds of papers," she sheepishly disclosed and continued with, "but it was VERY CLOSE to the bathroom,” as if that mattered. They x-rayed her hip and she had fractured it - her femur needed fixing. When she got up to room 2107, the staff moved her onto her hospital bed. An internist promptly visited her and she inquired, "What time is it Doc?" "It’s 8 a.m. young lady. Why do you ask?" “I need to get out of here in an hour. I've got to go to the beauty shop. I can't lay here looking like this. By the way, how do you say your last name?" The doctor spoke slowly…"G-H-I-A-M-A-D-I …GHIAMADI,” he said. "Oh my, that must have been a serious problem for you when you were in grade school," she retorted.For the next few days, the cardiologists monitored my mom’s vitals trying to get her ready to handle surgery. My wife commented to my mother about the excellent nursing care she was receiving. "You're getting so much attention, Oma." "Yes, and I might even get a tiara at the end of the day if I play my cards right,” she replied.Several days later, surgery was "all systems go." The launch had been delayed several times, but now we were doing the countdown. Exasperated, my mother put the nursing team on alert. "Let's get this show on the road. Just make sure they "cut" the right leg off," she jokingly said. As they wheeled her down to surgery, she kept it up, "Where are you taking me? It looks like we’re headed for the parking lot. Hey, don't let ‘em stick a knife in me if I'm not ripe enough!"When we got to the pre-op area, a nurse met us there. When the nurse bent over to take my mother's necklace off, my mother was amused. Hey, I guarantee you it's been a long time since anyone's looked down that area." When the nurse finished chuckling, she asked my mother the critical question. "Which leg is being operated on today?" Mom was playing it coy. "I really don't know," my mother replied. "Is it the left one Gladys?" the nurse said. "I think it is right; I mean, I think it is right that it's the left one … is that right?" The morphine didn't seem to affect her wit. It reminded me of Abbott and Costello, but this one was a monologue.She took the liberty of putting her surgical cap on before the anesthesiologist came to give her the "juice." The orthopedic surgeon strolled in and asked my mother if she had any questions. "I only have one question for you. Are you REALLY old enough? My daughter tells me you were born in 1970. Is that right?" The anesthesiologist entered and told my mother that her heart could handle the surgery and he proceeded to inject her in the arm so she could take a nap. "The surgeon looked so young. How old are you?" she asked. The boyish doctor said, "How old do you think I am?" "I think you're about 62," my mom replied. He grimaced and left for a minute and when he came back my mother had adjusted her assessment. "It's in my best interest to say that I'm sorry. With your cap on I thought you were older. You really must be around 45. You see, my son is in his early 60s, and I like him a lot." As I gave her a peck on the cheek, she was off to surgery and as she turned her head I heard her say to me, "Good luck on your new book. I hope it's a success."I never had a doubt that my mother would make it through surgery. She had successfully created an atmosphere that put everyone in her sphere of influence at ease. She chuckled her way through a revolting predicament and brought everyone with her into her humorous inner world. As my mother always believed, she was making funnies, the tried and true method of traveling through the golden years.
posted by James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S., LPC, CCBT @ 8:54 PM
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WHY SCOTT MCLELLAN CAME CLEAN
Most people, familiar with the workings of the George W. Bush White House are not surprised by the revelations of Scott McClellan in his riveting new book entitled, What Happened. His account punctuates the deceit and deception orchestrated by an administration that lied about the run-up to the war in Iraq and the deliberate leaking of intelligence information. The most pointed question is, why did Mr. McClellan choose to reveal his story? After all, providing the propaganda spin for the White House in no way left him accountable to share his narrative upon leaving Washington D.C. McClellan describes his experience as press secretary as being in a bubble. Within this bubble, he passed along convoluted political spin while remaining in a protracted campaign mode. As I mention in my book, Stepping Out of the Bubble, staying in the bubble represents the comfort zone, a place where we avoid the challenges and paradoxes of healthy living. The bubble protects us from having to confront reality. It is the place where we minimize and distort the full impact of real-life experience. The bubble is like an insulated cult - it protects us from the truth.Like a polygamist leaving the sect, McClellan's departure from political life led him to encounter the realities of civilian life as his political perspective subtly began to shift. McClellan was forced to grapple with a huge dose of reality when he testified before a grand jury in the Plame investigation on February 6, 2004. His deposition and grand jury testimony could not have been a comfortable experience. He must have reflected on his prior disclosure in a press conference when he said "the president has made it clear that he wants to get to the bottom of this matter (Plame case), and that anyone who has information that relates to this that can help the prosecutors move forward and get to the bottom of it should provide information to the prosecutors."I believe that testifying about these Plame-related matters may have forced McClellan to step out of the bubble about what he knew regarding the president's and his subordinate’s role in leaking intelligence information. Once McClellan had been debriefed by the grand jury, he must have experienced immense internal conflict. I believe that he must have felt enormous shame and betrayal and was primed for further disclosure.I believe that Scott McClellan told his story because he is an intelligent, honorable person who could no longer live with the burden of a lie. If he maintained the lie, he would lose himself. He told the truth, not for monetary gain, but because he was conflicted and wanted to rid himself of the weight of scandalous propaganda and behaviors that he validated as press secretary for the president. The shame of it all caught up to him and his disclosure is a way for him to acknowledge the scripted verse (referenced in his book) on the University of Texas tower which says "Ye shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free."James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S., LPC, CCBT is an author, freelance writer and nationally certified cognitive-behavioral therapist practicing in Scottsdale, Arizona. His book, Stepping Out of the Bubble is available at Amazon.com. James is the Shrink Rap columnist for TheImproper.com, an online site in NYC. He can be reached at www.krehbielcounseling.com.
posted by James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S., LPC, CCBT @ 6:50 PM
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HOW ABUSED WOMEN CAN BREAK THE CYCLE
Self-destructive Cycle of Victimhood Starts in ChildhoodWomen, who have a history of mistreatment in relationships, tend to place themselves back into relationships with men that foster further abuse. Often, after the damage, women appear to be mystified as to why they set themselves up. They are easily lulled back into situations that potentially blindside them to personal attacks and betrayal.Origins in ChildhoodSo what is the trigger that causes women to repeatedly choose to put themselves in harm’s way? There is a fascinating dynamic that originates when women are victimized by a troubled childhood; in hood, they tend to fluctuate between shame-based feelings and a sense of vulnerability to control. Women, who experience an absence of parental validation from childhood, will seek affection and attention at all costs. They will move through every stop sign imaginable in their effort to get "right" what went wrong during their difficult past.A lack of validation from childhood leads a woman to be vulnerable to emotional hurt which includes self-doubt, shame and blame. This mix of feelings fuels the pattern by attracting men who invade their personal space. The same useless interpersonal dance gets replayed over and over again. Putting themselves back in the fray is a women's way of trying to fix that which remains unfixable - the domination of controlling men.It’s Never Too Late to Embrace Positive ChangeAs they reel from additional assaults, these women eventually retreat into their private, emotional world. Then the cycle resumes. Rejection and self-blame lead to anxiety, followed by the quest for validation from those who can't give it. These ladies believe that if they try hard enough, they can fix any damaged relationship. Their illusion about the way things "should be" clouds their judgment and leaves them susceptible to further abuse. How do women break this cycle?· Let go of the dance and embrace the shame and fear.· Acknowledge self-blame and discover that the relationship wreckage never was about you.· Learn to experience the kind of constructive anger that says, "I deserve better."· Fight the urge to get in harm's way with those who would "flip things" by creating conflict. Stay above the fray.· Rationally respond to self-blame and vulnerability with positive self-talk.· Set appropriate boundaries that detach you from partners who might choose to exploit you through intimidation and fear.· Surround yourself with those who are validating and drop male friends who try to manipulate you as a way of bolstering their own ego.· Create new, positive goals, relationships and activities.Women who desire to leave behind their childhood pain must learn to shut down the pattern of being exploited by those who seek to continue the cycle of abuse. Women who have been abused, can learn to take a step back, refusing to “take the bait” while letting go of the patterns that previously put them at risk. Only then can they overcome the emotional trauma of their childhood and get themselves unhooked from the men that repeat it.
posted by James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S., LPC, CCBT @ 8:48 PM
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 Name: james krehbiel Location: Scottsdale, Arizona, United States James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S., LPC, CCBT is a licensed professional counselor and nationally certified cognitive-behavioral therapist practicing in Scottsdale, Arizona. Krehbiel is an author and freelance writer. His personal growth book Stepping Out of the Bubble is available through www.booklocker.com. James can be reached through his website at www.krehbielcounseling.com.View my complete profile
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Authenticity and the Gay Identity
It's a Long Way from Richwood to the White House
McCain and the Mob Mentality
Maintaining Sibling Relationships As We Lose Our P...
CHUCKLING YOUR WAY THROUGH THE GOLDEN YEARS
WHY SCOTT MCLELLAN CAME CLEAN
HOW ABUSED WOMEN CAN BREAK THE CYCLE
MUSINGS ON BEING A CONSERV-ATIVE
WHAT DO I KNOW FOR SURE ANYWAY?
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